The Fat Lady Sings At Leeds United

It was always a near impossible ask, but the Official Site boasted "You never know what could happen" earlier this week, so confirmation that Leeds cannot now make it into the playoffs must be a bitter pill to swallow.

The Cup victories apart - and both Cup runs ended in crushing defeats - this has been a season of massive disappointment.

Hopes were so high in the summer. There was talk of a Man City style take over, of billions of pounds flooding through an oil pipe line directly into the Warnock's transfer coffers. Master Bates was going. The glory, glory days were returning.

Even as yard dog after yard dog responded to the Warnock's whistle and Captain Snakeinthegrass joined the Exodus to Norwich, the Leeds faithful remained, well, delusional. This was the year. This was the beginning of the new era. The Championship was at Leeds United's mercy!

True the take over was taking longer than expected, true there were question marks over GFH Capital when the cloak of secrecy was, belatedly, removed, true the Warnock's recruits were every bit as average as the saner voices suggested, true Leeds couldn't win away and couldn't climb higher than eighth in the table, but no matter, the Arabs were going to give Old Big Gob a warchest of £8m, Becchio was going nowhere and Leeds were going to charge into the play offs. Oh and Bates would sod off for good.

Even when Bates was given the Presidency, even when Becchio departed, even when GFH Capital made a profit from transfer dealings in January, even when more yard dogs, like Warnock Junior and Morison arrived, the faithful remained, well deranged. This was the season. Easy run in. Goal Machine Morison better than Becchio. Warnock Junior an England left back. GFH Capital keeping money dry for next season in the Prem.

True eighth remained a glass ceiling. True results only showed a slight upward blip. True Leeds couldn't score goals. True the Warnock was floundering and GFH Capital sat on their hands. True the parent company suggested they were looking to offload the white camel of a football club but never mind, Leeds could still do it, the Leeds faithful remained, well, in denial.

But after yesterday's defeat at Birmingham, the fat woman can at last sing at Elland Road. But hang on is it a woman? Is it a marque tent rather than a marque signing? Or is it Ken Bates in drag singing Marching on Together?

But don't worry, be happy, the Messiah McDermott is now in charge, Byram won't be sold, GFH Capital will reveal their transfer war chest soon, next year will be the year...so, Singing On Together now...

Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best...

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle - that's the thing.

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin
Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow.

So always look on the bright side of death
Just before you draw your terminal breath

Life's a piece of shit
When you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true.
You'll see it's all a show
Keep 'em laughing as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.

And always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the right side of life...
(Come on guys, cheer up!)
Always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the bright side of life...
(Worse things happen at Portsmouth, you know.)
Always look on the bright side of life...
(I mean - what have you got to lose?)
(You know, you come from nothing - you're going back to nothing.
What have you lost? Nothing!)
Always look on the right side of life...