I thought LUST had gone a little quiet and put it down to embarrassment. After all, it was this mob that suggested they had the inside track on the great Arab takeover, and who raised supporters' expectations to fever pitch. Then the damp squib takeover happened and suddenly, nothing.
Now, in a great diversionary stunt, the Chairman of LUST is crying foul against Master Bates after the soon to be club President cruelly revealed on the radio that Mr Cooper had not attended any games over the course of an entire season. Unfair, screams, Cooper, firstly because Bates has abused the Data Protection Act to check how many tickets he purchased - the bloody cheek of it! - and secondly, because he did go to games, he just didn't buy the bloody tickets!
So, rather than an absentee fan, Mr Cooper is apparently a freeloading fan, cadging off his brother and brother-in-law who "took" him to games.
And how many games did Cooper attend? "About a dozen" apparently. "About"? How about Cooper names them and gives an exact figure? After all, he is such a passionate fan that every game is surely burnt into his memory.
LUST? It's more of a casual fancy if you ask me.